This is why you're not

"I'm hot cause I'm fly, you ain't 'cause you not. This is why, this is why, this is why I'm hot." -Mims

America: this is why you "not."

I don't usually tread in political waters, I keep my opinions to myself (because I don't want to give you the opportunity to tell me I'm wrong) but I can't just shut up about this. It's typical facebook bullshit, but in many ways facebook is the townhall of 15-25 year olds. It's our "main street" and on some levels Facebook offers a cross-section of society. Or a chance to snoop at people, but either way I'm outraged.

 

 I can't even sight/cite all of the shit that pisses me off in this comment section. First of all, are the spanish-speakers in Cornelius, Oregon from Spain? NO. So please, refer to them as "hispanic" or at the very least "mexican."* Are you "English" people? Then don't embarrass yourself, govna! That billboard that is in "Spanish" is there to advertise to the people who have immigrated to the United States from "Mexico." Simple as that. And if it is your "pet peeve" than why don't your learn how to speak Spanish?

What part of "The United States has never declared a national language" leads you to believe that "we" (who is this magical entity?) can make people learn English? Why should they? Are your ancestors Native Americans? No? Oh, then shut up because you're the descendant of immigrants as well. Oh, you ARE Native American? Then you must be pissed that all of us whites were never MADE to learn your Native tongue. 

Take a look outside yourself and your experience. Imagine coming to another country, trying to better yourself, and having an upper middle class white girl complain about the fact that she has to press a button on a phone menu. What a hardship. 

What a hardship.

*Because it is less ignorant to assume that Spanish speakers in Cornelius, Oregon are from Mexico than it is to assume that they're from Spain. Which, by the way, is in Europe. The way that you portray yourself on Facebook leads me to believe that you may not have a firm grasp on basic geography.**

** I am not a genius, and I can't point to every single country in the world on a map on command, but I behave with common decency and I do not complain about pressing a button on a phone because we welcome people from other countries with open arms. Pressing 1 for English is the least I can do. 

The very least.

2012

As Ferris tries unsuccessfully to wake up his daddy I'm reflecting on 2011 and looking forward to a new year. David put it best, yesterday when he said "2011 was a rollercoaster." Holla.

We got married, we moved, we quit our jobs, we got a dog, we got new jobs, David got fired... I feel like I was depressed, got a little better, and then the world said, "You think you're depressed, I'll give you something to be depressed about" and then bitch slapped me. I should say "us." The world bitch slapped us. That's something that I like about being married, I feel totally justified in using the words "us" and "we."

We'll be fine though, we always have been. Right now though, my biggest concern is breakfast. :)

Therapy

Art

Time

Exercise

Eating Right

Phone Calls to Home

Quality Time with New Friends

My pyramid of therapies has gotten me through my loneliness/depression. My hubby and puppy deserve some of the credit as well, when I am having a tough day or having a "loser moment" he just goes on licking my face as usual. And the dog is a real sweetie too! So, after almost 4 months I finally feel in control. I'm going to work on giving myself credit for that, stay tuned. 

Speaking of which, future blog ideas: Best biscuit in Greensboro, Strange Items in a Southern Grocery Store, Top Ten BEST things about Greensboro, same for Portland, and my first Thanksgiving feast. 

Thanks for sticking with me after all these silent months, more to come, SOONER even!

4 Weeks

It has been 4 weeks, almost to the hour that we've been here in Greensboro.

I am so happy to say that I finally have friends. A coworker of David's introduced me to a friend, who invited me to a birthday party and I had 3 events in 2 days with those girls! We also went to our first little party with PHD/Masters students from David's program; everyone was really smart. We couldn't stay long because David had his first online skype gaming session with his friends from home.

We have library cards, a couch, a stocked fridge, and a workout schedule. We're getting a puppy, I cook 2 or 3 times a day, I'm applying for jobs (I need about 10-20 hours per week it turns out) and I'm reading A LOT.

We know our neighborhood, have favorite restaurants, and found a dollar movie theater.

Obviously, I'm doing better. After a few days of crying and feeling like I was under the The Bell Jar I found my way out, thanks to my husband, my mom, and my good friends from back home. I have a renewed zest for life and as soon as we get financial aid in the mail (tomorrow?) I'm going to buy a lot of canvases so I can make reasonably priced art to sell at the Tate Street Festival (as long as I get my application in on time!)

The weather will be cooling down 10 degrees per month (I'm told) so I'm looking forward to wearing a sweatshirt in a couple of months!

My Loneliness

My omnipresent all-consuming loneliness. I take it with me everywhere I go, lingering at the counter of the coffee shop, in pleading looks to strangers at bars, at home, on the couch. I’m not bored, and I am not as homesick as I was prepared to be, but I am so lonely for female company.

I have very depressive episodes where I wonder if I’ll ever have enough friends to host a dinner party, or if I’ll ever be invited to a birthday party or a wedding. This is a taster of what it is like to be a single man I think. I meet girls in bars, they tell me that I’m nice/funny/interesting and advise me on other cool bars, I might have the guts to ask for their phone number or Facebook account but then the next day they don’t respond to me. I feel rejected, and I am so desperate for their friendship. 

This past Sunday marked our 3 weeks being here. We still don’t have a bed (who cares!) and I still haven’t made my first girlfriend.

When we were cleaning out the car in Oregon, I came across an Ed Ruscha art postcard. It’s a painting that is grey with a large orange circle and the words “I was grasping for contact” written in plain, large white letters. I remember knowing that there was no more room in the car, so I put it on my passenger visor and like good writing it was foreshadowing for my current state. I wondered, 4 weeks ago, if it was going to grow to mean something deeper to me than just my inability to chuck it.

I think the best course of action is to make a T-Shirt that says “LONELY” on the front and “IN NEED OF FRIENDS” on the back. I’m sure that won’t drudge up any weirdos. Good plan.

Crazy Sunshine

The SUN. It's everywhere. It's relentless. Yes it's hotter than hades, and yes we need to keep the AC running in our house almost all the time but it's wonderful! Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) can't exist out here,  Greensboro doesn't have the required equipment. Because we can walk almost everywhere my vitamin D levels must be off the charts. It's rarely cloudy, and it really is not as humid as I thought it would be. Today, it is a very dry 91 degrees and my walk to the coffee shop was actually pleasant. If you know me, you know I have undergone some sort of change and let me assure you, even I don't understand it.

But you know what I miss? Sweatshirts. Sitting outside at a restaurant because it's sunny rather than stepping inside a restaurant and sighing at the wall of cold air hitting my body because it's sunny. I miss not squinting. Cool summer nights (we have hot summer nights which are nowhere near as sexy as they sound.) I miss picking up my wine glass and NOT having condensation pour all over my leg EVERY time.

I am enjoying the weather change and I am confident that with each new season, I will welcome things I have missed as well as find new, Southern-specific weather related things to despise. Until that time I will continue to enjoy my morning walks at 8:50am in 89 degree heat.

If you have a chance, listen to one of David's favorite songs, one that I can't get outta my head in this weather.

Beer Here!

One of the biggest problems I’m facing here is that beer tastes so much better than in Portland. Is it because it’s always sunny? Is it because it’s so damned hot out? I don’t know but it’s twice as easy to drink twice as many beers here.

We have 2 breweries in town. One is in honor of the founder of Greensboro, Nathaniel Greene and it is delicious! The other one I’ve heard is not so great, but it gives us the ability to say, “No, tonight lets go to the good brewery.” And who doesn’t love that? We’re within walking distance of a store called “Bestway” that sells all the great beers! If you’re in the Portland area, it reminds me of John's Marketplace and if you care about beer at all (and if you don’t, how to you make it in PDX?) you owe it to yourself to check it out.

David found his favorite beer from Oregon, Dead Guy Ale from Rogue Brewery and they even sell GROWLERS! God bless the South! They also have my favorite Rogue beer, Hazelnut Brown. Num num num!  North Carolina doesn’t have a bottle deposit so we can just toss our bottles into the big recycling can instead of trying to save them and then giving up after a few months and sheepishly putting them into the recycling knowing that we’re throwing out good deposit money.

Beer is cheaper here. It is an incredible thing to behold, a 12 pack of Miller High Life (it tastes good too, not all beer needs to be in a big bottle and cost five dollars or more you snob!) is less than seven dollars. And let me tell you, nothing takes the edge off of walking from the car (with AC) to the house (with AC) through the exhausting heat quite like a cold one. And after opening the front door to check and see if we have mail, the only thing that makes stepping back into the AC better is a beer. See how easy it is?

They sell beer virtually everywhere, local coffee shops, burger stands, bars (obviously.) We couldn’t be more pleased (obviously.) 

Hubby and Wifey, lovin' the sunshine and beer

These photos are from the "North American Organic Brewers Festival" in Portland, Oregon on June 25th, 2011. It's not NC, but it gives you an idea of what we like to do.

 Elyse and her gal pal NJ